Wow, I'm a having a bad blood sugar weekend. And it's only Saturday morning. Now I haven't slept. I have to keep telling myself that this is just a phase that happens a zillion times in the course of a pregnancy. And all I can do is document the sugars trends for a few days, correcting them as needed, and call and get the input from my team as to the changes that need to happen.
On a positive note.... I had a wonderful visit with a very good friend. Chris who lives in Kansas came up to visit his family and friends for a few weeks, as he is deploying in June. And he came in yesterday for a while and today for several hours. It was so good to see him. And talk like we never stopped. I am truly blessed to have people that go out of there way to visit me. So I am not sure that he reads my blog.... But he will probably never know how much that meant to me.
That visit was followed by my sister Marco aka Whitney, and of course Kaylynn. We hung out for a while and I am always so shocked how fast she is growing. She is so cute... She loved throwing off random things off my couch. Lol and when she couldn't reach the things she would get mad and pound her little fists and whine about it.
My older sister Callie came in with Trey Trey, and a beautiful Betta, fish tank and all. She then spend a great deal of time setting up the tank in my window. I named him Gregory. He is a beautiful blow graceful fish. And it is very soothing to watch him glide his little body threw the water and around his plants.
My momma called me, and we talked briefly but we said we would talk later as I was with my sisters. The left at 6:30 ish. After a nice walk with the kiddos. It was truly a wonderful day.
Dinner was already in my room after my walk. However I had a horrible blood sugar issue and so I had to really focus to stay alert enough to eat. It took me 2 hours for my sugar up. And then it went up plenty. And I have spent the last 6 hours fighting with it to get it down.
I am really afraid of being judged and ridiculed by my doctor. I know that she would like my blood sugars managed in a different form. Which Frustrates me I don't believe that going back to shots is going to be as successful as the pump. It is going to take control from me and give it to her. I understand that she would like more control. But I don't feel that I am doing a bad job. I check my sugars and follow the changes that doctor tanner and his capable staff have instructed me to do.
I think that the staff here at the hospital have a tendency to focus on the diabetes, which as I have so many times pointed out is NOT the reason I am here on hospital bed rest. I am here because of a incompetent cervix. And a thin lower uterus scar. But they are not causing problems right now. Therefore they are focused on numbers and things that are frankly not in their control. And also not out of control.
Which leads me to want to hide when things get out of control. Which leads to frustration and stress.
Anyway, I am loved and cared for
And I am very grateful for all of the people in my life. Thank you so much all.
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