Lol, it was a good day, grandma's birthday party. Pizza, cake, and normalcy
My baby boy is doing well. He is behaving and cooking like a good kiddo.
I am not going to lie... I sometimes feel like all of this is my fault. I should have waited longer to have another kiddo. Maybe then I wouldn't be here, working so hard to get him here safely.
But Justin made our already happy life complete. We knew we wanted more then one. And I guess if it wasn't supposed to be heavenly father wouldn't have made it happen. I just have to keep faith and know that everything is going to work out in the end.
Anyway, my momma brought pizza and cake.. And flowers. Also kayla and molly and paula. Jason brought Justin and clothes... As well as some contraband! Yay thin mints! Grandma brought auntie beth and Callie brought Trey! Whitney brought miss Kay Kay.
The only thing missing was Lindsey, and Amie.
We went for a walk, and it was so good to get out as always. But because Thursday things got all messes up I haven't gone out with my people in a while. So it was really nice.
A few conflicts are.... I got a call from my dad Carry. Who I don't talk to a whole lot. But he has visited a few times, and called some also. He wasn't feeling good and sounded it. The doctor ended up coming in in the middle of the call, I told him I would have to call him back. I didn't get a chance to do that. I did however call my grandma back from earlier that morning and she mentioned he was upset about how I hadn't. In his mind it is hard to make the time to call everyday, and not feeling good doesn't help. So I felt really bad.
I mean I don't mean to be ungrateful, I just got busy, preoccupied. But I feel guilty. Not a good feeling
I woke up on the 7th dizzy and disoriented. I ate breakfast, lunch, had and IV hooked up for additional fluid. And then threw up my lunch, I had a really mean headache and a low blood pressure. So I slept pretty much all day, well off and on. But is wasn't a good day. I ignored phone calls pretty much all day. Which of course makes people mad. Or offended, or whatever. I don't know why... I mean I just don't understand it's not like I don't have stuff I am doing, anyway.... I am just...... Whatever.
I am worried about a good friend of mine. She is really sick, I would do anything to make her well. But she is at home now which is better. Then in the hospital. But still I want to make it better, she has been so supportive and very much there for me in this particular hard time. She has experience In hospital stays. I want her to be better. Now please.
I am working on Justin-head's blanket.. It is about halfway done. And I am reading new moon, it is really good. I like it a lot. It is better then twilight.
Anyway my head ache is coming back with a vengeance so I am going to put this to a close. And see if I can get some sleep after a snack.
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